The Difference Model

Am reading a very interesting article about autism and how scientists are looking at it differently: "This movement is being fueled by a small but growing cadre of neuropsychological researchers who are taking a fresh look at the nature of autism itself. The condition, they say, shouldn't be thought of as a disease to be eradicated. It may be that the autistic brain is not defective but simply different — an example of the variety of human development. "
From: http://www.wired.com/medtech/health/magazine/16-03/ff_autism?currentPage=1

I've read a lot of material in which people think ADHD is a very mild form of autism - or at least in the same family. ADHD is primarly about social acceptance and the willingness by people to conform to social norms.

I keep asking myself, "is that really so important? Who defines the social norms?"

Our society, and probably most societies, consider conformance to social norms the greatest goal of education. However, our geniuses, Einstein, Picasso, Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, and I would argue Ted Turner (not that I admire him but I think he is a business genius) etc, eschewed social norms. I wonder that if by focusing on the conformance of ADHD children, we are missing out on their strengths, so much so, that eventually, those strengths are hidden for a lifetime. And we've lost another great creative mind.

I'm not proposing any type of institutional solution. I don't think our public school system can adequately serve the needs of these children. I think the solution lies in us as parents training our children that they are created by God, they've been gifted with certain strengths, and they need to develop strengths, all while obeying God's laws, but not necessariliy conforming to societal expectations. They need to be taught that not everyone appreciates their differences, but God does, and they just need to hang low for awhile until they are at the point in their life in which they can use their strengths to serve humanity. Because if they hang-on, they will get their chance.

How's the ADHD Diet Going?

It's a very altered version of the original ADHD diet, but I've learned a few things. Overview of diet:
** little sugar as possible
** everything organic and hormone free
** Gluten free

First of all, I've learned chocolate is a NO-NO. It really intensifies his emotions. Thankfully, that's not too awfully hard to cut out of a kid's diet. Especially since his new school doesn't seem to pass around candy and chocolate as much as the old. (WHAT IS UP WITH THAT? Is it not hard enough to limit candy and junk food at home without the schools offering it as REWARDS?? But again, I'm not a teacher and don't ever want to be to children under 13.)

Here's what I've been successful at:
** giving him cod liver oil daily - have no clue if it helps, but it makes me feel better
** replaced fake fruit snacks with real fruit leather (no sugar, artificial anything)
** am buying organic milk, eggs and butter, no hormones has to be a good thing, right?
** all natural peanut butter and jelly, his main staple (no added sugar, preservatives, etc)
** shakes with yogurt, ice, real fruit and a tiny bit of sugar - the kids love them! sometimes this replaces junky snacks.

Here's what I've failed at:
** Gluten free.
Ha ha, my attempts at gluten free cooking have been laughable. Here's what's really laughable - my kitchen is stocked with:
- tapioca flour
- white rice flour
- brown rice flour
- xantham gum
- some other stuff I can't remember not even spell right now.

All of this is needed to create gluten free bread. My family almost staged a coup when I tried to serve it too them. I haven't COMPLETELY given up yet, I hate to let something beat me.

** Going completely organic. Can't even find everything organic.

So what have I learned?

#1 - I like going as organic as possible because I think our world would be a better place all around
#2 - chocolate is bad for my boy. Poor kid!
#3 - how am I supposed to measure whether or not it's helping?
#4 - the no added sugar/ all natural stuff tastes really good and why didn't I do this a long time ago? I mean, isn't the added health benefits worth the extra cost? Might save me thousands of dollars in medical bills down the road - who knows?

P.S. I'm not trying to be preachy - I never would have done if the threat of ADHD pharm drugs wasn't hanging over my head. But now I'm kind of glad I've tried the diet out.

Drill Seargent, Anyone?

My kindergarten son is now home with me Tuesday and Thursday because his new school is only three days. So, I had plans of home schooling fun, with me planning little activities and him working away diligently while I work on my computer (I have to get 8 hours of work in too those days). HA HA HA HA. That was a really funny dream. NOT going to happen.

But I try. I plead, I guilt, I bribe, I threaten Daddy's wrath, but no, not even one little worksheet gets done by my sweet little son. Messes get made, and not cleaned up. I hear "I'm too tired" all day. Or my favorite, "My legs hurt." That is, until the arrival of Drill Seargent.

Mr. Drill Seargent (aka Daddy) walked in Thursday around 5:30 pm, set the timer on the stove, and told my cute little son to clean the office, clean his room and complete three worksheets before 30 minutes was up. Guess what? He did it. No whining, no hedging, and the THREE worksheets he completed were beautiful - pretty cursive writing from a 6 year old.

WHAAAAA???? Am I really that incompetant? Or does it have something to do with male anatomy? Yeah, that would be a good out, but no, it's me. I don't have the drill seargent skills. It's what my son needs, but I really don't know how to go about it. Anyone know of a good military boarding school?

Or any less drastic measures? HELP!!

Bad Day At School

Wednesday he had a bad day at school. We received a note home that he was disruptive, kept saying he was tired, laughed when he was reprimanded, only completed one page of his work, etc. "Was this the type of behavior he had the at the other school?" Yes, it was. But, he had gone almost three weeks without that kind of behavior at the new school, so that's good, right?

Come to find out - he actually was tired. Fell asleep on the couch before 8 pm that night.

So what does this tell me? It tells me that he is much more susceptible to the environment than my other kids. Last week was crazy in our household, and the kids were shuffled around a lot. Very bad for him. He had a babysitter the night before the bad day. Very bad for him. He must not have slept well. Again, bad.

So, maybe a couple lessons learned?
1. Keep the weekdays as normal as possible for him.
2. Make sure he gets lots of sleep
3. 5 full days of kindergarten was probably too much (he now has 3)

But then why I am his mom? Because I hate predictibility. I thrive in chaos and constant activities.